Gropey, the forgotten dwarf.
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Yes, in addition to Happy, Sleepy, Grumpy, Doc, Sneezy, Dopey, and Bashful, there’s GROPEY. And unlike his seven counterparts heading down to the mine, he’s not whistling while he works – he’s ogling passengers, because he’s a TSA agent. Turns out if you opt out of the x-ray body scan – which shows not just the contours of your bod, but every nook and cranny of your physique, including any, um, feminine hygiene products – you can instead be groped. Gropey (or one of his pals) will give you an extensive pat-down, including the handling of your “junk” (as one passenger termed it, asking the TSA groper to stay away from his privates – resulting in possible jail time and an $11,000 fine). Let’s all say it together – “We’ve let the terrorists win!” First, we had to take off our jackets, sweaters, coats, etc…, then our shoes, and now we’re going to be shown in all our naked glory or groped thoroughly by a stranger. I’ll go for the groping, however, as that can’t end up on the internet.
And speaking of terrorists, we’ve just elected a whole bunch of ‘em – hell-bent on making us all afraid. Of each other, anyone foreign, anyone progressive, anyone who believes in a different God than they do, or -gasp!- no God at all. They’re demanding that Eric Holder and Janet Napolitano resign, and these b@stards haven’t even taken office yet. All due to torture-derived evidence being deemed unreliable (NOT “inadmissable”, but UNRELIABLE), which resulted in 279 of the 280 charges against one of the first Gitmo detainees being dropped. So much for waterboarding eliciting anything useful.
Other bizarre news? Faux News effectively donated $40 million in free air time to right-wing candidates during the last election. And a host on MSNBC who donated less than $10,000 total to 2 candidates – personally – got suspended? OK, so it was only for two days, but COME ON. When will people wise up about the lack of NEWS at Faux News? One bright spot – a Philadelphia talk-show radio station has dropped Sean Hannity and Glenn Beck – hallelujah!!! Of course, we have no idea who’ll fill their time slots. We haven’t been asked, in case you were wondering…
And if you were wondering about the bubbles in your water here in PA, it turns out that despite homespun tales of long-ago-dug wells that always had some naturally-occurring methane (and were flammable!) in the water, the methane NOW in water in PA is directly traceable to the gasses being released by FRACKING, the process of fracturing shale, thousands of miles beneath the earth, to release natural gas. And guess what? In addition to your water becoming unsafe to drink – and SHALL WE SAY IT AGAIN – FLAMMABLE – natural gas customers in PA will see their natural gas bills double. And not due to taxing the companies doing the drilling – which our legislators are too chicken-sh*t to do – but because of the cost of extracting and processing the gas. Nice. They’re gonna poison us all and then charge us more for the gas they’re extracting. Frackers.
And speaking of politicians who are chickens (no offense to the real birds), the Lancaster County Commissioners voted 2-1 to close down our county’s Human Relations Committee. They claim it was due to the expense ($400K per year, to handle nearly 2000 cases, most of which were settled without the expense of a trial), but even after the state’s HRC asked them not to close our HRC down (they can’t take on our case load), the Commissioners did. Well, one did. Republican Scott Martin and his hand-puppet Dennis Stuckey voted to end the HRC, and the lone democrat, Craig Lehman, voted to keep it. So now the mom working 3 jobs who just got evicted because her landlord doesn’t like her Hispanic-ness (or blackness or any other of hundreds of stupid petty things) will have to take time off of work to go to Harrisburg and plead her case to the state HRC. Way to go guys. And all because a lot of people wanted sexual orientation added to the list of things that the HRC would defend against discriminatory acts in housing, employment, etc… Martin & Stuckey weren’t having any of THAT, so… no HRC for Lancaster County.
Of course, there’s a whole lot more - so we hope you’ll listen all the way through to the Lunatic Fringe – where we find out the Today Show interviewed an avowed pedophile about his book, which was recently removed from Amazon.com’s inventory, and about how the turkey on your Thanksgiving table is the product of centuries of genetic tinkering to make it so fat it would die, horribly, if it wasn’t horribly slaughtered. The traditional Thanksgiving feast, based on a fictional meal shared by the Pilgrims (those pious smacks) and the Native Americans (gee – talk about a “last meal”) was designed over time to be cheap and easy to prepare. And it contains a frankenturkey with a breast so big it can’t survive. Nice. So chow down, Uhmericans, and be thankful you’re not a turkey.
On that cheery note, we’ll be back in January, as we’re taking a Holiday Hiatus. We’ll be spending the time improving our studio and testing some new equipment, all to bring you MORE Sense in the New Year. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving, Happy Holidays, and we’ll see you in the New Year!
THIS WEEK’S LINKS:
“Rebooting the American Dream” by Thom Hartmann